Earlier today a friend came over and I think I probably got excited and maybe overwhelmed her with all the homeschool organizing and preparation I have been doing. I am excited about this coming school season and have spent more time in preparation for it than any other year…that is a good thing. After my friend left I started thinking about how she was in such a similar place to what I was just a few years ago. I sat down and wrote her an email encouraging her and sharing some things I wish someone had shared with me when I was where she is now. It kinda turned into a long email but by the time I was done I realized that I wanted to say these same things to lots of moms. To encourage and lift them up while hopefully helping them to avoid some mistakes I made. Here is an excerpt from that letter…
…”I feel like you are where I was just a couple years ago and I am praying for you. Good things are ahead. If I could go back and encourage myself here are a few things I would say, I know this is all unsolicited so take these as far as they encourage and spur you to excellence and leave the rest…
Pray – as a homeschool grad with more experience than most it is easy to forget this step. Every part of our year, school, home and otherwise needs to be covered in prayer.
Be realistic about my personality – I am always saying I am not an “organized person” and that is true compared to the typical type A personality but something I have come to realize is that as much as I say I am unorganized, I sure am the first one to organize activities, play dates, classes, etc with friends…I see that in you too 🙂 hmmm…maybe we are more organized than we think. It just looks different. I don’t think either of us like to be tied to a structured/rigorous schedule, we like to be creative and follow the learning. That works especially in the younger years but I am learning that the older my kids get and the more I have of them, the more I need to allow for those things by actually planning for them. That being said, God gave my kids ME and not another mom so what works for someone else may not work for me. There are things I know about myself that I need to factor in to my homeschooling. Things like…community is important to me, I am a researcher, I love beautiful things, when others have needs I will stop what I am doing to help, I have a newborn 🙂 What are your things??
Vision is the starting place– The Bible speaks a lot about plans and what happens when we don’t have vision or a plan for what we intend to do.(Prov 29:18, Luke 14:28, Prov 16:3, Prov 15:22) It doesn’t have to be a 5 point plan with 75 sub categories but writing down your vision and goals not only helps you better plan for your year but also can be really inspiring and help you get excited about this whole homeschool journey.
Talk to my husband – Part of creating and casting a vision involves our husbands. They are a big part of this whole thing, not just for us but for our kids. That being said, I had to be careful with my expectations for how much my husband would have to say. He did have ideas for our overall vision – the “why” behind our homeschooling and the “what we want in a graduate” but a lot of the day to day and even year to year was up to me. Ask what is important to him and do your best to incorporate those things. Don’t be upset if he isn’t as invested in the day to day as you are.
Simplify – Although what I have now may seem to contradict this if you really break it down what I have planned is very simple and involves a lot of play. I love it when my kids don’t realize that what we are doing is school but in order for that to happen I can’t be doing everything. SIMPLE
Don’t start half cocked – Because I am the kind of person who can easily ad lib or come up with ideas on the fly, in years past I didn’t really set up my year. If I am honest, I didn’t see the value in it. I always made it work so why change it. Last year was the first time I was really intentional about getting things ready – curriculum, school area (which is actually our living room and a bookshelf) and my house. I didn’t start school until those things were ready and it made a HUGE difference in how my year went. My house wasn’t perfect (it never is) but it was tidy. I didn’t add another thing to my day when all the bathrooms needed to be cleaned, I had a huge pile of dishes in the sink and the living room was covered in toys. I don’t usually need to do this but for school it really kept me from feeling behind from the very beginning. This year we are starting school a week later than I originally planned and that is because I got the school stuff organized but in the process, my house fell apart. I am gonna get that under control and then start. This is something the whole family can help with! I have even been known to hire someone to clean my bathroom (no shame) and it is SO worth it. I wish I had started this earlier. I would have avoided feeling like I was behind before I even started.
Let God stretch you – This whole process from marriage to parenting and definitely homeschooling is very sanctifying. Sometimes I feel pulled in lots of directions in a bad way but my desire is to simply be stretched. A rubber band is only achieving its purpose when it is stretched and I feel like it is similar for us as humans. God may surprise you with what you can do and how you do it. I am by no means an expert at this- I like the comfort of doing things the way I know I can do them and succeed. I don’t like the possibility of failure any more than anyone else but the Lord is working on me and I have found so much good in the process. Like I told you, I really think I am becoming the best version of myself and I am excited about it.
I am here for you friend. I see great things in you and I know the Lord is going to bless your year. You have so many strengths that God is going to use in your school this year as well as in the future. It won’t be perfect but it will be good. I hope you can take some time to plan (even though it may be hard) before you start. Let me know if I can help in anyway. I am praying for you!”
Thara
