diligence (noun) careful and persistent work or effort.
I love learning! I want my kids to love learning too! We are blessed to live in this century, as homeschool moms especially. We have the ability to work outside the limitations of large classrooms, government testing and schedules. There are Pinterest boards and blogs, websites and curricula, magazines and podcasts all dedicated to inspiring us with ideas and resources on “spreading the feast” and making learning delightful. I love it! I really do! But one day as I was working with my Kindergarten age son on writing his numbers I realized, this wonderful world of resources might be deceiving. NOT on purpose! Please don’t take this as some sort of rant against beauty and amazing ideas. I love those boards, blogs, curricula, magazines and podcasts! I just realized that as I sat there hearing my son complain and whine and throw a fit about his numbers, I started to think “I am failing at this. He doesn’t love learning” and other nonsensical things. I was tired and tempted to just give up. Then I realized, I would be doing my son an injustice by setting him up to think every thing he needs to learn or do in life will be fun and presented in a beautiful way that makes it seem like he isn’t even learning. That isn’t real life! Sometimes there are things we have to learn and do that are NOT our favorite…not even close! All I was asking was for him to finish writing out the numbers 1-9, something I knew he could do. He just didn’t want to! At that moment it was more important for me to teach him diligence and self control (through my example) than it was for me to make sure that writing those numbers was the most fun ever. I should note here that after he wrote them on the chalkboard I let him play a game that had him practice in a different way and he loved it. That was my plan the whole time. I don’t want to give the impression that I am a drill sergeant or don’t understand that at his age, school is a lot of fun. I get it. But I think there needs to be a balance.
Our world as homeschool mamas revolves, in many ways around our kids. It is a beautiful thing. But we need to be careful that we aren’t giving them the impression that THE WORLD revolves around them too. If you don’t homeschool, this still applies to you and your kids! I am just sharing from my own perspective and teaching my kids at home is a part of it.
I want to raise kids that love Jesus, love others, & love learning! Part of loving those things means they will need to learn to do hard things, be diligent, be kind, love their enemy and not take the easy path just because its easy. Not everyone will agree but I think this starts right now, when they are little! If these habits are created now it will be SO much easier for them to continue as they grow and they will also reap the benefits!
The character being formed in the kids of today is the character that we are going to see in the leaders of tomorrow. Think about that! What kind of character do you want to see in the leaders of the future? I certainly don’t want them to think that everything should be fun and easy!
I know this whole idea could easily be misunderstood or misconstrued so here is what I am saying…
- Don’t purposely make things boring just to teach diligence & torture your kids. – There are tons of amazing resources and curricula out there, use them, just don’t become a slave to them.
- Know the difference between the need to persevere (and teach diligence) and when a certain curricula isn’t working. Every kid is different so if this is a consistent problem you are having with a specific curricula, you may need to evaluate and make a change.
- Make sure your child truly understands (or is working towards understanding) before you expect them to just power through. For example, if they really don’t know how to hold a pencil, they need to focus on diligently learning that skill before worrying about perfecting their numbers.
- Watch your attitude. As parents we can easily get frustrated while helping our child learn diligence. I have responded harshly and had to apologize to my kids. That is ok! We aren’t perfect but it is important that we check ourselves and when we make a mistake, apologize.
- Take into consideration your child’s age. If they are very little they can still learn diligence but in smaller doses. When your toddler is playing, let them figure out how the blocks stack, don’t do it for them. They might make a mistake but they will learn and the process is good for them.
So the next time your child is complaining about having to do their chores or school assignment, instead of feeling bad for them or being tempted to think you aren’t a good mom, remember some of these verses…
“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Galatians 6:9
“The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied.” Proverbs 13: 4
“The hand of the diligent will rule, while the slothful will be put to forced labor.” Proverbs 12:24
“Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men,” Colossians 3:23
Now is a good time to start talking to your kids about diligence and why it is important. Share some of these verses and stories from your own experience. Encourage them that you struggle too but that you are in this together. Pray with them and for them. Be diligent mamas! With God’s help, we can do this!
