My son is turning 6 this month. I can’t believe it! Everyone told me it would be this way but I didn’t realize how fast he would grow. His birthday has started me thinking about his birth, actually each of my children’s births so I thought I would share them here. I wrote this account not long after Simeon was born. Each birth story is so unique. As a birth educator and doula I am constantly learning from each birth I attend. I was a new momma here and oh, so many things I would love to go back and tell myself. Relax, rest, enjoy this time, don’t worry about losing the baby weight, trust your mommy instinct to name just a few. I firmly believe that the Lord uses parenting to refine us and this was the start. Simeon’s birth was what set me off on my journey into the world of birth. I became a DONA doula and a Bradley Instructor soon after because I wanted to help women in my area have as beautiful an experience as I did. It wasn’t perfect but it was mine. I hope you enjoy…
To begin this story I have to tell you May was a really busy month for my family. My due date was May 20th. My little sister’s birthday is May 19th and two of my other sisters were graduating from high school on that same day! There were so many things going on, with preparing for graduation, parties, work, trips, etc I was really hoping the baby would come early so that my poor mom wasn’t trying to drive or fly to the birth. Since I live in Lubbock and she lives in Bryan it would take around 7+ hours to get to the birthing center in Midland. Everyone kept saying I would be late but I just kept hoping they would be wrong…and they were!
At 5:02 a.m. on May 13 I was lying in bed when all of the sudden I felt a small trickle run down my leg. I immediately went to the bathroom, not even thinking that it could be my water breaking. I just thought maybe I had to go to the bathroom. (There are so many weird things that happen when you are pregnant, leaking in the night didn’t seem that weird to me.) As soon as I got to the toilet woosh a flood of water…and then I realized what it was, my water had just broken. It was one of those moments that was a mixture of excitement and “oh my goodness, what do I do now!” I grabbed my cell phone and ran to the guest bathroom so I could call Shanna, one of my midwives. She told me that contractions should begin within 2-4 hours and that I should try to eat something so I would have energy and go back to bed and get some rest. I immediately called my mom so she could get a head start on her long trip. The conversation was kind of funny because I could here Dad in the background saying “is she sure?” and mom telling him “YES Doug! Her water just broke! She is sure!” So with those phone calls done I woke Dax, my husband, to tell him the big news. We were both pretty hyped up by this time but I told him what Shanna had said so he got up and made me some oatmeal, made a call to a friend to ask if he could check on our dog while we were gone and then we headed back to bed. Before going to sleep though Dax gave me my first mother’s day present, some shoes I had been wanting but knew were too expensive. I gave him a gift that I had gotten for him for when the baby was born – Goodnight Moon it was his favorite as a kid and I wanted our baby to have it too. After spending some sweet time together just talking, laughing and praying we finally went to sleep. I hadn’t had any contractions by the time we woke up at 8 a.m. Shanna suggested that I get a breast pump and try pumping a little to get the oxytocin going she also told me to get some castor oil. Dax and I headed to Target to get the needed items.
By the time we got all the necessary items (including water-proof mascara so I would at least have that on during pictures) it was around 10. Since my contractions still hadn’t started I called Shanna again and we decided that I should be in Midland by 2 p.m. for sure even if my contractions weren’t very strong. The next 2 hours went something like this…I got dressed, pumped, walked around the block, had some castor oil (with a milky way bar chaser), walked again, spent some time in the bathroom, we straightened the house, got lunch, watched half an episode of Monk, drank another ounce of castor oil, walked again, and finally we headed to Midland. In all that time I had only had around 5 light contractions! On the drive to Midland the contractions started to get regular and more intense. Dax had been especially concerned about the drive to Midland, thinking we would be speeding the whole time and worried that he would have to deliver the baby on the side of the road but the drive ended up very normal. Praise the Lord!
J, another one of the midwives and my Mom and sisters were there to meet us at the birthing center. Dax, my mom, J and my friend Hannah were with me in the birthing room and all my little sisters and my sister in law stayed in the waiting/living room. When J checked me I was 2 centimeters dilated (but she could massage me to a 4) and fully effaced. I took more castor oil (which I was not happy about) and started walking around the birthing center for the next few hours. At around 5 p.m. the contractions really started to kick in, getting intense and frequent. I had the routine down perfectly. Mom and I would walk around the center and then about the time the contraction was really getting hard I would sit on a birthing ball in the birthing room until it was over and then start walking again. Despite the intensity of the contractions I was able to relax and let my body do its job. I was thankful for the relaxation practice we had done in preparation. Hannah is a NICU nurse and had been my partner in discussing all things baby/pregnancy/labor related. She had never seen a natural birth so I invited her to attend mine. I remember once as I was walking around the center about to have a contraction I asked Hannah what the emotional stages were because I wanted to see which one I was in. She said “well, there is happy excited…” I immediately interrupted her by saying “yeah, over that one!”
After a few hours (note* I really have no idea what time it was during most of this. The info I have comes from Dax and a contraction tracker app on my phone.) I started to feel pressure, almost like I had to go to the bathroom but I knew I didn’t (the castor oil had taken care of that earlier) my mom told J and she came to check me again, I was 6 centimeters! J explained that the pressure was the baby’s head coming down and showed me a chart explaining it all. Sometime soon after this I hit transition. This was the part I was most scared of. I had heard how intense it is and how it was the most painful part of labor for some women. Ironically, I didn’t even realize it was happening until I heard Hannah tell mom that I was definitely in transition. Even though I was in pain, having double peak contractions I was relieved that it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I have no doubt that a big part of why it wasn’t so bad was because of all the support and encouragement I had. Dax & mom never left my side. Dax reminded me to relax & breathe just like we had practiced. Mom was the voice of experience, reminding me that I was progressing and that everything was normal. Hannah was in charge of timing the contractions and doing anything else we needed so mom and Dax didn’t have to leave me. J was there when we needed her but wasn’t hovering. She let us have time alone which was great.
Since I was at 6 we decided to go ahead and start filling up the birthing tub (a giant Jacuzzi like tub they have in one of the birthing rooms) J said it would take around 45 minutes and thought by that time I would be ready to get in. Mom and I both thought I was going to progress faster than that since I was feeling more intense pressure already. We were right! 20 minutes later J checked me again and I was fully dilated and ready to go. At that point I felt the need to push. I had read many birth stories and heard women talk about “the need” to push but you just don’t understand until it happens to you. My body was ready to push and was going to push whether I wanted to or not! I moved into the tub and asked J how long pushing usually takes, “it depends but about an hour or so” she told me. In my head I thought “NO WAY! We are NOT gonna take an hour! Lets get this over with.” and that is seriously how I felt. Pushing was the hardest part for me, not because it was more painful but because I didn’t feel like I was making progress. I pushed with all my might, trying to make each one count. My efforts were rewarded because at 8:12 p.m. after only 10-12 minutes of pushing, Simeon Dax Reinitz was born. I held him in the water as we waited for the cord to stop throbbing. My sisters came in from the waiting room to see him and there were many tears of joy and amazement. I just kept saying “isn’t he so beautiful? I can’t believe how perfect he is!” Dax cut the cord and was handed our sweet baby in a towel while I delivered the placenta and they cleaned me off. I had to get a few stitches because Simeon came out with his hand up near his face but other than that the birth was picture perfect. We left Midland the next day and although tired I was excited to get home with our new baby.
About 5 days later I began to experience “baby blues”. I was a wreck! Crying all the time, anxious, exhausted, and emotional in the extreme. I wasn’t sure I could be a good mom. I didn’t want to be alone because I was afraid of what was happening to me. I didn’t recognize myself. The midwives suggested some herbs and supplements for me to try and J called or texted me everyday for a week. Dax was a trooper, encouraging me, praying for me, and taking the baby when he could so that I could have a break. I called my mom almost everyday in tears wishing I could see her in person but until she could come visit the Lord provided in other ways. I got in contact with friends who had gone through the same thing and it was such a blessing to talk to them and hear that this was normal and everything was ok. I spent a lot of time listening to uplifting music, and trying to take every thought captive. Psalm 30:5b was my constant encouragement “weeping may last for the night, but joy comes in the morning.” Every night I reminded myself that joy would come in the morning and after about a week it did. That week was one of the hardest I have ever experienced and that is why I wanted to include it in Simeon’s birth story. It is a reminder of God’s faithfulness and provision. I am not sure if I will experience the blues after future pregnancies but I want to be able to look back and see how He walked with me. I also want to be able to share with others my experience so that I can be an encouragement to them just as friends encouraged me.
I loved my experience with the birth center. My labor and delivery were exactly what I had hoped for and my recovery was great (despite the blues). The midwives at Motherly Way Maternity were amazing! The Bradley training I had was a wonderful tool. It helped me understand what my body was doing and gave me confidence to relax and let it do its job. I walked away from my sweet baby’s birth with no disappointments, only cherished memories. Dax and I agree that we can’t imagine having a baby any other way!
